This month, Glamour magazine tells me that I can run for office. Yesssss! The advice is to start now and start small: “Volunteer for a local campaign, or write about politics on your blog.” Gee, how convenient.

Unfortunately, I know nothing about politics. Well, almost nothing. I majored in political science (yeah, don’t ask), but I just can’t get myself to follow the latest news. Government reform, the war, health care — major yawn. That’s why I get so squeamish when election time rolls around. People get so heated and I feel so lame. (I still don’t understand why ‘girl power’ and ‘charming husband’ don’t qualify as substantial reasons to support a candidate.) It’s annoying. Everyone acts as if they’re smarter than you, when really, they just care more. Ask me about other stuff. Do it! What type of haircut do Katie and Suri have? A bob! What’s the Japanese word for tuna? Maguro! What did Michelle do today? Go to work! I WIN!

If I did have a say in American politics, I would follow S. Korea’s lead and offer women this and also mandate that each member of the male species watch one season of “Sex and the City.” The world would be a better place.