M: Wanna know a secret?

Me: YES!

M: Well, I just heard that _____ is quitting his job.

(long pause)

Me: And ….

M: And what?

Me: That’s it? That’s the WORST SECRET EVER!

M: What do you want me to say? And he’s having an affair?

Me: Ooooh. That’s juicy. Tell me more.

M: (rolls eyes)