Perhaps I need a Master Cleanse, but not the kind where I can’t eat. Because I love food too much and I know me too well. When I see delicious, I will eat it. Instead, I need to cleanse myself of other toxins in my life, the clutter that makes my days heavy.

Sometimes I feel barricaded by a wall that’s so light and easy to move, but I won’t kick it out of my way because it shields me from the gusty storm of life. But I’m drowning in myself.

And I just want to lay here.

I now understand why grownups I know use their vacation days to stay home and do nothing. Not nothing, of course. They’re gardening and running errands and shifting their worlds back into place. It’s a time to replenish.

I yearn for that.

I scheduled Nothing into my GCalendar. Like I actually typed the word Nothing. And I’m so committed to Nothing that if someone asks me what I’m doing, say, next Saturday, I can look at my schedule and say Nothing. If that person says great, let’s do/go/eat/watch _______, I can say, no, didn’t you hear? I’m doing Nothing. Get it?

Nothing is important to me.

I need inspiration.

I need clarity.

I need change.