You know how I’m always disgruntled with my career, no matter what, even when I’m doing the Thing I’ve Always Wanted To Do? Well, this past year, I finally realized that my frustration has very little to do with my actual job and everything to do with me. Let’s take a look back.
Shortly after college, I was an education reporter. It was the BEST JOB EVER. I got to write stories on freak dancing, banned books and teens who blog (hey, it was kinda newsworthy back then). I was gonna be the best education reporter, maybe one day I’d write big stories for Newsweek, maybe I’d even get a book deal! I was filled with passion and drive and energy.
And then I got bored.
Ugh, I was so bored. Really, who would want to write about standardized test scores and school district zoning and construction referendums? If I had to sit through one more school board meeting snooze-fest, I was gonna blow my brains out. I felt tired and stagnant. So, I quit.
I then became a fashion reporter. You guys, a fashion reporter! It was the BEST JOB EVER. I basically shopped for a living. Every day, my desk was piled with the latest bags and shoes and jewelry. I could do big things in my career, I thought. I could write for the major women’s glossies. I could get paid to travel. I could get my own column.
And theeeeen I got bored. I mean, how many possible ways could one describe a denim miniskirt, anyway? It’s blue. And it’s … skirty. I had to face it. I didn’t love fashion and probably never would. So eventually, I quit.
I continued to write for a living and started getting into blogs. Recently, I wanted to start a wedding blog. I’d go all out, posting daily inspiration, hopefully even getting sponsors. It would be the BEST JOB EVER. I was already spending my days swooning at my computer screen–might as well put that energy into a little business.
And then (surprise!) I got bored. Of wedding stuff. (Can you believe it?) I’d look at blogs and think, “Wow, another engagement session with balloons. So original.” (Not that there’s anything wrong with balloons! You should totally take photos with balloons! They’re so vibrant! Don’t hurt me.) But I’d see the same stuff over and over and realized I’d have nothing to add to the wedding world. So I’m pretty much over the wedding blog idea. (Though you know I’ll still be writing about my wedding here. All. The. Time.)
The point of all this is: I’m fueled by the thrill. I get really excited about my potential but hate doing the actual work that’s required to reach it. And because of this, I will forever be mediocre. I will never rise to the top.
Unless I make some changes.
In 2010, I need to pinpoint a subject area (or “beat”) that I want to tackle and then go at it and stay at it. Even when it’s boring. Even when other opportunities flash at me and scream, “Try me instead!” I’m 28 years old and should be done with the exploration stage. I need to focus and then re-focus. I need to make something stick.
You were an education reporter? I know (knew?) a guy named Joel (I’ll leave his last name off here) who was an education reporter for the LA Times. You must know one another right? *smirk* He’s hot, too, if that helps whittle down all the other education reporters. =)
wow so exciting! so many jobs at 28! (it seems) i’m feeling a little bored now, but i’m not very ambitious and adventurous, sooo i’m not doing anything different as of now. i desire something more meaningful…and that doesn’t require me being at work at 8am. haven’t found that yet. hahah! good luck finding something to stick to! focus focus!
Hello Michelle,
This is so me! I get so bored very easy, instead I get bored with careers. But, I finally realized writing is my passion!
I think even if you were to find the “perfect job,” you’d still feel disgruntled some days. That’s what we have hobbies for!
Me thinks sticking with something has to do with maturity. I’m working on that aspect too.
That sounds completely familiar! I love the *idea* of something, but when it comes to actually executing…meh, not so much.
what about going back to school? to kinda reinvigorate your passion/knowledge/skills? not the cheapest endeavor, but could be worth it in the long run.
of course, says me who is currently unemployed. i resigned from my kindergarten teaching position at a school that shall remain nameless cuz the school itself was terrible – my safety and mental health and happiness were more important. i had taught previously for 5 years in another district and school. i loved it there, but the new admin made me hate my job so i left. and i’m glad i left that school when i did, since i had always told myself that the minute i didn’t find my job/efforts/time/attitude worthwhile anymore, i would leave.
so i went back to school to get another masters and another credential and now i’m almost done! it was the best thing i ever decided to do, even with all the stress of being unemployed. i will be the first to admit, though, that i’m a big nerd and adore going to class and being a student. so maybe it’s not for everyone, but i just thought i’d put that out there.
i always read your posts, michelle, even though i don’t always comment. plus, i think steven and i have only met you once when matt and steven hung out more regularly, but that’s besides the point.
anyway….. happy wednesday! and cheers to self-reflection and perseverance =)
Don’t worry, you’re not the only one that’s bored. I’m at a job that is mundane. I see the same files/cases that my job has become routine with a specific process flow (e.g. the movie, “Office Space”). After reflecting my past experiences, I realize what kept me on toes was when I got to interact with clients and negotiate with opposing parties etc. For example, I rather play a video game against another person than against the computer because people are unpredictable. (The challenge for me was to predict the next person’s move and once I figured them out, on to the next person…hmmm I wonder if this is also an underlying problem as to why I can’t keep a long term relationship?)
Anyway, in sum, I think if you wrote about people, instead of “things” or “events,” you’ll find the variety and challenge that you’re seeking because people are unpredictable and each person has a unique story.
sounds like my love life.
BEST MARRIAGE EVER
oh wait
Wow, I don’t know if Todd is a regular commenter, but that kind of seems like a low blow comment.
Anyway. I totally know how you feel Michelle. I think that’s how we’re supposed to feel in our 20s. I haven’t had a lot of careers (see: having a kid in college), but I’ve realized I need to have novelty in order to persevere. Sometimes that just means shaking up what I’m already doing in some way.
You’re a great writer Michelle (but you already knew that!). But it’s not like you’ve had the opportunity to do your dream beat. As interesting as education, fashion, Koreans (whee!) and weddings are…I’d imagine they’re not on your top 5 passions list. Even that’s hard to figure out at this age, but maybe it’s a good starting point?
I can so relate to you. I’ve started a few side projects that ended up dwindling into nothing. So instead of focusing on the side stuff, I’m working to bring my thoughts and ideas to further round out my already established place to write. Hopefully it amounts to something, we’ll see.
“I hate doing the actual work to reach it” – this is so an issue I have too!
okay you have had some amazing jobs, i am impressed. but i totally feel ya, as much as i love my job now i have a feeling we all get bored eventually and i’ll have to find something that i absolutely love and stick to it. and if you can do it, i think i can too eventually.
You’ve had a hell of a career. I think we all get bored with obs sometimes. But when you find your true passion, you stick with it- or, rather, it sticks with you. Like writing. And here we are.
I mean Jobs. I type good.
i don’t know. i kinda think, from my perspective, that your job(s) seem awesome. and that you’re not mediocre and what’s wrong w/ that anyway? but then i think, ew i hate being mediocre. so i get ya.. but i can see both sides. when is something ever good enough?
Have you thought about the trend to why you got bored with all of these jobs?
Hmm, I don’t know Todd, but I took it as a joke comment rather than a mean one…
‘Cause I’m semi-the-the-same way. I know I want to be a writer, but I haven’t been able to stick with a novel long enough to make it good. Why? Eh, lots of reasons, but mostly after I work on something for a long enough time, I get bored of it.
So I need to work on that. But like you, I’m in the right field, just haven’t found the right story.
And my okay-it’s-been-a-while-I’m-bored-now-ness doesn’t affect my interpersonal relationships. I’ve been with the same guy for 4.5 years, and I’ve had the same friends for 2-24 years (depending on when I met them), and I’ve had the same parents for 24 years… Clearly people are not affected by this boredom thing.
Which is why I assumed Todd’s comment was a joke. If it’s not, poo on him, but it’s nothing to worry about in reality, I don’t think.
Kristan, Nina: Pretty sure Todd’s comment was a joke =)
Yes, yes. I think I’ve been reading too many mean comments on cnn’s political ticker. Sorry Todd!
*proceeds to go hide sheepishly in the corner*
Hey, I think it’s perfectly okay to find a passion, actually achieve the goal and then move on. Maybe it’s that excitement that fuels your work and makes it great? I don’t think you necessarily have to stay in one area for a long time.
Btw, glad you spoke up about the wedding blogs. There are way too many of them and they all re-post the same stuff.
Don’t say things like this. . . your career is more solid than mine is! 28 and done with the “exploration stage”. . . psshh (that’s a sound of annoyed indifference, by the way)!
maybe you should do a wedding blog. this is your only opportunity unless you get married again. You can get some free stuff. only 7 months to go. then after that you can make the wedding blog into a book. i don’t think it’s been done before. wow, what a great idea. lol
You sound like an ENTP. Google it. ENTP. You might learn a thing or two about yourself.
I know this comment is way late, but: Hi! I think we might be the same person. I have a really difficult time finding something I like and continuing to like it for a long time, too. Or, more recently, I’m having a hard time figuring out what the hell I want/like/need to do at all. Bah. But yay for recognizing the need to make something stick. And here’s to all of us 20somethings figuring that shit out sometime soon.
I really hear ya on this. I’m struggling through the exact same scenario. I have a lot of learning and life experience behind me but I just don’t know what I want to DO for my life.